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I went through a breakup…

Unhinged Habits

The greatest threat to your potential is the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th most important things you could be working on.

Your inability to focus on your greatest priority will hurt your potential far greater than your lack of intellect.

Tune out the world. Lock in.

You can tell how successful someone will be by the type of questions they ask

Losers "How do I start?" or "How do I stay consistent?"

Winners "Here's what I'm doing, how would you speed this up?"

Losers ask for advice on their ideas. Winners ask for feedback on their attempts.

Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.

The higher you go, the more options and access you will gain.

Which is why it becomes increasingly paramount to remember what you set out to achieve.

Author Jeanette Winterson on writing as an expression vehicle:

“As soon as you have found the words with which to express something, you are no longer incoherent, you are no longer trapped by your own emotions, by your own experience; you can describe them, you can tell them, you can bring them out of yourself and give them to somebody else. That is an enormously liberating experience.”

Investor Julian Shapiro on writing as crystalization:

Astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson is known for being quite eloquent in interviews. When writer David Perell asked how he’s able to be so articulate on the fly. Neil told him that nearly 100% of the stories and analogies he shares in interviews are first written down. Most people don’t realize this.

In 2023, I went through a bad breakup.

I had to look this girl in the eye and say…

“My priorities have changed”.

She was my ride or die.

We were inseparable since 4th grade. We practically grew up together.

But I had to let her go.

We had so many incredible memories together.

I remember after we first met, I felt so nervous and embarrassed.

So I worked my ass off to never have that feeling again.

She helped me become a better person.

But in 2023, I realized I had outgrown her.

She was holding me back.

And I had to let her go.

This “girl” was basketball.

After I metaphorically pulled the trigger, everything improved.

My online business grew faster.
My grades got better.
My sleep improved.

I had entered a new season of my life. And the only way for me to continue to add things to my plate was to first subtract.

That’s one of the biggest lessons I’ve been reminded of in my friend Jonathan Goodman’s new book Unhinged Habits.

The core idea is simple but uncomfortable:

You cannot maximize money, health, and relationships at the same time. Anyone who pretends otherwise is lying or burning something important in the background.

Instead, Jonathan pushes seasons of intensity. Go all in on one pillar for a defined window. Then maintain it while shifting focus. It feels obvious after reading it. But most of us live in permanent half-effort mode and call it balance.

What I appreciated most is that the book isn’t anti-ambition. It’s anti-accidental ambition. It’s about choosing your hard, instead of waking up in a hard life you didn’t consciously design.

As someone who's early in their career and still figuring out what a "good life" means to me, I really enjoyed this book. Jon is one of the clearest thinkers I know, and a damn great writer.

If you care about building a meaningful career without losing your health or relationships, this is worth reading. It gives you language and structure for tradeoffs most people feel but never articulate.

—

Apologies for the bait and switch on the breakup haha. I thought it was a creative angle to help promote my friend Jon’s book. 😅

On a more serious note: If you've been following my journey for a while, you've probably noticed I'm in a different season now.

I left my job at Acquisition.com (will share more soon). I'm working on my second book (will also share more soon). And now I'm facing questions without obvious right answers.

What does it mean to be rich? How do I actually want to spend my time? What kind of person do I want to show up as?

It's overwhelming in the best way.

I don't have it all figured out yet. But I think that’s the entire point of being in your early 20s. Not to have all the answers, but to enjoy the experience of exploring the questions.

For now, I'm treating it like an experiment. Testing things. Staying curious. Trying not to rush to conclusions just because uncertainty feels uncomfortable.

I'll keep you posted on what I find.

Until next week,