A reflection on my definition of "rich"

Dimming your success, downplaying your goals, pretending you don't want more to avoid making others uncomfortable is the fastest way to be liked by everyone, but respected by no one.

The greatest sense of satisfaction against a hater is that they will continue to live their life and you will live yours. Living a good life is a greater form of revenge than trying to get back at them.

All it takes is one year. Just one. To completely change the entire course of your life. One year of committing to your goals. One year of avoiding distractions. One year of ignoring your doubts and insecurities. One year of saying yes to the things that scare and excite you. One year of waking up early and getting after it. Most people overestimate what they can do in a day and underestimate what they can do in a year. Don’t be most people. Go all in.

Author Mateo Martez on how to treat people:

"Treat rockstars like regular people and regular people like rockstars."

David Perell on studying successful people:

“One of the biggest mistakes people make when learning from somebody successful is assuming that they’ve always acted the way they act now. People calm down a lot once they make their initial money. Learn about who they were then, not who they are now.”

I just spent the last week skiing in Utah.

It’s incredible how much power and control you feel as you descend the mountain.

Anyway, today I want to talk to you about an idea I heard from Blake Rocha called “The Slow Rich Life”.

For the past 5 years of my life, I’ve been chasing other people’s definition of “rich”.

The money. The status. The influence.

Now, that’s not necessarily a bad thing. I think overall it’s been a net positive on my life. But I’ve realized the harder I chase other people’s definition of “rich”, the harder it is for me to actually feel rich.

For example, I spent the first half of this week scheming the best business model for me to take home $1m in personal profit (I scheme, even when I don’t need to). But then I stopped and realized I was optimizing for the wrong outcome.

What good is $1m/yr business if I spend every waking moment stressed, miserable, and distracted from the other areas of my life?

I know that sounds like a champagne problem and, of course, there are ways to make $1m/yr without the above side effects. I think the point I’m trying to make is that my goal has never been to “win” the game of business. My goal has been to “win” the game of life.

I want to be rich. I’ll admit it. But not so I can buy a Rolex or Lamborghini or flex on social media how big my business is.

I want to be rich so I can control my time and go to the gym on a random Tuesday at 3pm. So I can sit at a cafe and order breakfast without looking at the prices. So my wife and parents don’t have to worry about money or getting a job. So I can travel freely and show my kids the world. So I can take my friends out to dinner and say “don’t worry, it’s on me”.

That’s my idea of a rich life. Money isn’t the goal. It’s a tool to live a deeper, more fulfilling, adventurous life.

My North Star is a play off of Naval’s quote:

And honestly? I don’t need that much money to achieve that. I love the game of business and want to excel at is, but not at the expense of the rest of my life.

I want to write books. I want to create content. I want to inspire people. I want a loving relationship with my wife, parents, brother, and kids. I want to have energy and be able to physically do things I want to do. I want to be calm, confident, controlled. I want to not have to answer to anyone. I want to work with cool people on an inspiring mission.

And maybe that means I take life slower. Maybe it means I sacrifice profit for peace. Maybe it means I work less and live more. I don’t know.

What I do know is that I’d rather leave this thing we call life with more stories than regrets, more love than hate, more give than take… and a big grin on my face.

Until next week,

Author of You Can Just Do Things

Ps. I don’t think there’s necessarily an explicit lesson in the reflection above, but I do think it’s worth it for everyone to reflect on what it means for them to be “rich”. Because how can you hit a target that’s undefined?

Pps. It’s hard to have a vision for your life when you have many bills to pay. Which is why I’m such a big advocate for doing everything in your power when you’re young to build a financial safety net so you can think about these deeper questions.

“I didn’t just land the role with that organization but I also got to speak at the conference, which was real huge for me. I was literally the youngest speaker on that panel that day.”

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